Self Tanning

This year I've decided to try and get a little color on my scary white flesh. I noticed that my sister had a nice glow going when I saw her last weekend and she informed that it was a bottled tan. These have come A LONG way from when they first came out and everybody looked orange, so I decided that I would give this a try as well. I have to think that it is better than laying out and baking in the sun using baby oil to "enhance" the burning and scarring.

Mind you, in the past when I lived in complexes with pools I would set Memorial Day weekend aside and spend all Saturday and Sunday out by the pool slathering on the baby oil (or Tropicana Coconut Oil - SPF negative 20) reading and drinking and slipping in the pool to cool off. Memorial Day Monday was always spent slathering on Aloe Vera and praying that the blisters would go away before I had to go back to the office on Tuesday.

Well, back to present time....I went to Target (one of the best stores in the world) and purchased some Nivea Sunkissed Lotion for legs, which is also supposed to slow down the need to shave, and some Jergins sun lotion stuff. I've now been using these for 2 days. I have to say that I think the color is coming in. I don't look quite like death and according to the bottle it will only be enhanced.

My only concerns are for some reason my skin has a strange odor to it. It smells sorta like it would when I would go to tanning booths. I don't know if anybody else can smell it, and I'm sure as heck not going to go up to people and ask them if I smell, so it might just be in my head (plus I admit that I am VERY sensitive to smells). My other concern is whether we really know that this stuff isn't going to cause some sort of health problems 30 years down the road (not that it'll matter for me because 30 years from now I'll one foot in the grave anyway). I mean, they used to think laying out in the sun wouldn't cause damage.

Oh well, I guess I can't worry too much about this. Lord knows I'm damaging my body in so many other ways that adding a little color to it can't be that harmful....

Flight Home

Normally, I wouldn't have much to say about my flights when I travel. You get on the plane, you settle in, you hope for the plane to take off and land and not have any real issues. If you are some people you break the rules and never turn your phone off, or if you are lucky enough, you get on a plane that has WiFi and you can update your Facebook Status the whole trip.

Today, however, I actually have something to write about regarding my flight.

I flew Frontier Airlines, and had to stop at Denver both directions (I was flying between San Francisco and Kansas City). The stop over is all of 30 minutes, or it was supposed to be that, but more on that later. In the future I recommend that you ALWAYS check in 24 hours in advance, if possible. I didn't do that on this trip and I paid for it. On both legs of the trip I ended up in row 23...the last row on the plane....the seats don't recline and I was right next to the toilets. My other concern was that I would be the last person off the plane and since I had to get to a whole other gate in a very short period of time.

When we landed in Denver, I realized that the attitudes of the folks the flight from Kansas City to Denver are very different than any other flight that I've been on in a long time. Normally, when a flight lands everybody is immediately out of their seats, getting their luggage out of the overheads and jockey-ing for who will get off the plane first. On this flight, I swear, everybody stayed in their seats the entire length of the plane until the row in front of them had emptied out. I sort of reminded me of church when the ushers would guide the rows down to Communion. Of course, I was still getting antsy due to the time to make my connection, but there was nothing I could do about it since I was in the last row, in the window seat.

Luckily, the plane that I was transferring to was late, so I actually had time to sit and people watch for a while in Denver. When they started calling for boarding, I was in the next to first group to board, since they boarded the people that needed assistance (including the Greek Orthodox Priest and the odd guy that was wheeling around on a tricycle) and their Gold club members. So, I get on the plane, make my way to the back of the plane and waited for my row mates to show up. This leg of the journey, I have the aisle seat, so I opt to stand in the back instead of having to keep getting up and down as they arrive...of course they would get there and then decided that they wanted to use the toilet, so I just kept standing around. AND it turns out that the lanky, hippy, guy that was in the middle seat hasn't been introduced to the magic of using soap in the shower OR deodorant...so that was QUITE pleasant to sit next to that for 2+ hours.

Then, about 30 - 45 minutes out of San Francisco, the older woman gets up and uses the toilet. As she is leaving the toilet and walking back up the aisle and she seems pretty unsteady on her feet. A couple of rows up from me, she really starts to lose it and this one guy gets up and tries to steady her and then the next thing you know he is guiding her to the ground and everybody starts hitting the call buttons. Luckily the guy that helped lay her down was a physician as were his two traveling companions. She ended up having a seizure and passing out. It turns out that she was diabetic and her blood sugar was totally out of whack. Everybody jumped in to give a hand, and truly pulled together to give this lady assistance. Eventually, she was able to get up and sit in one of the seats. The guys that were helping her sat on either side and kept an eye on her and when we landed everybody stayed in their seats so that the paramedics could come on board and help her off.

So, I've sat next to people with body odor before, but I've never been on a plane that had a medical emergency....all sorts of excitement!

A House Is Not a Home Unless It's Clean

May Procrastination List: 

1. Compare and contrast three different floor cleaners. Call a neighbor over to be a second judge. 
   
2. Organize your cleaning supplies in alphabetical order. 
   
3. Compare a load of laundry using a liquid softener versus a softener sheet you put in the dryer. 
   
4. Clean underneath everything - you never know when a guest will drop something and assess your cleanliness. 
   
5. List the five cleaning items you use most often, then check three stores to see which one has the best overall prices. 
   
6. Be sure each bathroom has a clean, well-placed plunger. 
   
7. Go to the websites of the manufacturers of all your favorite cleaning supplies and search for coupons. 
   
8. Clean the cobwebs from the corners of your garage. 
   
9. Thoroughly clean between the number keys on all of your telephones.
   

And your personal Procrastination List Question: Guess how many screws you have in each room of your house. Then check and see. (Remember to count wall plates, lamps, closet doors, appliances, etc.)

Random Food Thoughts

Strange things that have been on my mind lately....

• Has any body else seen the new M&M commercials for the "fancy" M&Ms? Of course this would require you all to actually watch the commercials. Anyway, they are creepy where the Green Girl M&M in the white Go-Go boots is all rolling around in the satin sheets and at the end the Red and Yellow Boy M&Ms are all melty holding the film equipment. I just don't want to think of my candy as "sexy". 
  
• Why do so many smoothies taste like bananas....or rather, why do they have to us bananas in most smoothies? 
  
• Whoever thought that buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies was a good idea had to be smokin' something that is only legal if you have a prescription and live in San Francisco or Amsterdam. 
  
• Mr. Pibb is not an adequate replacement for Dr. Pepper. 
  
• My Mom used to make the BEST popcorn before microwave popcorn was created. Luckily Pop Secret makes one now called "Homestyle" and it is very similar, but not the same. 
  
• I used to binge eat ice cream.... for some reason my tastes have changed and I have had the same 1/2 gallon of Thin Mint Chocolate ice cream in my fridge for a month.... What is happening to me? 
  

Some other random thoughts that have nothing to do with food....

• The television show Time Warp is going to have Metallica on this coming Wednesday. 
  
• I'm torn between watching that and Dangerous Warriors on Spike TV. 
  
• I think I like these shows because they are showing science and history in a new way. So you folks out there with kids should look into watching these shows (or TiVo'ing them or whatever you do)!!
  

So, my there are my thoughts on food and television, both of which I indulge too much, but oh well.