Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Massage Thoughts

I had a wonderful massage yesterday (I do love a good "rub down"). I always seem to the same thoughts whenever I have a massage:
  • What would happen if you could sneak a little Metallica in the middle of all the Vivaldi, whale songs, and Andean pan flute music.
  • Oh man, my feet are so dry, I'm so sorry massage dude.
  • If I were ever in a situation where people started eating one another for survival, I would probably be one of the first ones they'd kill. I mean, come on, I have nice large muscles (thanks inner athlete) but with some lovely marbling (thanks Ben and Jerry).
  • Why am I so interested in cannibalism or rather why people would be driven to that.
  • I wonder what sort of weird dreams I would have...I mean if a good steak gives me vivid dreams...
  • I'm bored now.
  • I think they've played this song before....Metallica would be great right now.
  • Please don't try and talk to me...I don't want to have to concentrate on what you are saying nor do I want to have to form words.
And the thoughts tend to spiral through this vein for the extent of the massage. Sometimes I throw in a little something about tenderizing the meat, but that covers things.

Am I complete wackjob?

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Death Wish

I think my little toe has a death wish.

Last night I managed to stub the poop out of it and as I look at it this morning it is a lovely purple band encircling it right where it joins the rest of the foot. I'm trying to get up the courage to try and put it into a pair of shoes and go to the gym for my morning workout. (On the other hand, maybe I should rest today and go back to sleep instead of the gym...)

This is the same toe that got so blistered (which I alluded to in Emergency Kit) that I actually ended up losing the nail. It is also one that I ended up breaking many years ago and learned all about buddy taping since it is a little difficult to put a cast on a pinky toe. (The breaking of it was caused by stubbing it as well....hmmm).

This is also the toe that I threaten to have surgically removed so that I can wear cute pointy-toe shoes, too bad I haven't done that yet.

Well, hopefully, this little piggy will shape up soon as I am not spending this week nursing a toe back to health.