The reasons that I think I'm probably going through this right now are all over the map, but most of them surround the fact that I had such a negative day at the office yesterday and that I've fallen off the healthy eating wagon. I was so annoyed yesterday and didn't want to face another day of annoyance today, that I almost opted to not come into the office (it has been awhile since I've taken a mental health day). But that really isn't something I could do in good conscience since my boss is out of the office this whole week. Plus, I want to walk the Stanford Dish after work as I know that will be very helpful to my condition.
But you may be saying to yourself, "What does ABBA intend to do about this to address it in the future?" Well, let me tell you....
- Walk more, everyday, if I can.
- Avoid negative people. After spending the weekend with some of the happiest people, I find myself very envious of their lives and want a piece of that for myself.
- Learn to say "no". This is a tough one. It isn't something I do well. The Queen left me a big NO sign for my wall, but I still can't seem to form the words.
- Eat better. I admit, I've been hitting up the fast food again. So, that means stocking up the freezer with more Lean Cuisines, since I don't cook no matter how many times I try to think I'm going to.
- Drink more water. Lots more. I have the big bottle sitting on my desk, I just sorta forget to drink from it.
- Really, really find another job where I can just sit at my desk with my headset on, listening to music, and focus in on my task at hand. I have to remind myself that I don't want to be management and that the battles that have to be fought at work are not always MY battles to fight.
- Stop letting everybody else's issues and problems become my issues and problems.
- Stop feeling guilty when I'm not constantly plugged in. I need to remind myself that if I want to spend the whole weekend in my jammies working on quilts and not speaking to a soul, that it is okay to do that.
- Stop listening to the negative voices in my head. Trust me, this may be the hardest thing to do. I have a terrible inferiority complex and suffer from social anxiety disorder, so this is way harder then some people can imagine.
I'll keep you posted.
9 comments:
ugh, not good.
1. exercise sucks, but it does make you feel good... at least when you get done with it!
2. I can send you a pic every morning of my smiling face. Or, maybe you need the recipe for happy coffee.
3. We can have daily practice sessions :)
4. fast food is an addiction... it sucks to quit it
5. yeah, I need to do this, too
6. we need to work on this
7. I have an article I need to send you (another fun school thing!)
8. love weekends where I don't have to deal with people!
9. turn the music up :)
I can totally relate to this list. Not only do I agree with you on all your points, but I also feel for you and am proud of you for making this list. A huge one is to say "no" - I had to learn this the hard way, but now I say no all the damn time and my life is so much less complicated!
10. Make a button-on-pin or t-shirt that says "Don't ask. The answer is NO!" And change your voicemail message to "This is Andrea. Don't ask, the answer is No!"
Then you even save the stress of hearing the problem in the first place!
I'm curious "do those happy people say "No" that you mention in this blog? I realize that there are boundaries and one cannot let themselves get overloaded b/c then it gets to the point of being incapacitated with too much to do but if you are having such a hard time saying "No" and its causing you stress maybe looking at the whole thing from a different way? Just a thought. I get the feeling right now that you are frustrated because you feel put upon but the way i look at it is that the reason everyone comes to you is because they see you as someone who they rely on, trust and count on. All good things that reflect on you! So when the inner voice starts in say back to it " these people would not be coming to me if I was not up to handle it and they obviously see things in me that indicate I can handle it"
in addition you have been walking very consistently as well as doing pilates once a week ( going to twice a week would be ramping it up as you stated) so you are actually in my view doing very well. The food issue is now your big hurdle. As for cooking since you are not a cook thats a good idea for the frozen dinners since they do taste good nowadays but I think you could try fitting in trying out cooking once a week and see how it goes. Lets make it fun by picking a recipe and doing it with a bottle of wine:-).
Pop Xxanax...or Ativan...and all those good things you mentioned.
I'll take the role of cheerleader
I wish my mom took me for more walks
I'd like to request that QB sends both of us her happy face every morning...if they are anything like the collection of before pictures she took...it'll be a great way to start the day! :)
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