Don Quixote - Battling Windmills

This came to me in a dream the other night that in a way, we all have a little bit of Don Quixote in us. We all have something that we are battling.

Some of us have external battles like illness, poverty, abuse, etc. And I'm very thankful that I don't have these battles.

I have a number of internal windmills that I'm charging at on my mighty internal stead. My most recent struggles have been with, as most of you are well aware, what I'm doing with my life and myself. Luckily, I've made a decision and have some actual movement. Last week I turned down a job offer to leave my current company and work as a contractor with potential of making some pretty decent money in overtime, but I chose to stay with my company and not be lured away by just the money. I'm not quite ready to step away into the contracting world and go skating on that lake....fun and exciting as it may be it is also worrisome and unstable and not what I'm ready for and I don't know if I'll ever be ready for that.

Instead of venturing out into the unknown, I've decided to remain where I am and am taking a position on a different account. I'm excited and nervous. Excited because I'll have that opportunity to do something new. Nervous because what if I don't fulfill their expectations and it turns out that I'm not really prepared to do this new job. (Another windmill that I'm constantly struggling with is my self esteem/self worth.)

My next struggle is to determine where I'm going to land...do I rent, do I buy and where....

In the future if you ask how I'm doing and I answer "Battling Windmills" know that I've got an internal struggle going on and may very well ask for opinions....